One day while I was studying for a final the question, “What am I holding back?”, came to me and it’s been on my mind ever since. It’s interesting that the thought manifested while I was concentrating on something else, but it also makes a lot of sense. In many ways, my experiences as a graduate student have actually helped to fortify my creative pursuits. The hours of studying, planning, researching, and practicing have sharpened my organizing skills in ways that I did not fully anticipate. The past four years have enriched my mind and spirit so deeply, ultimately benefiting my creative practice, as well as opening up creative opportunities. Most recently, one of my photographs, made with the amazing Mz. Dysha, was featured on the IG account of @cordellamag. Cordella Magazine is an online quarterly that shares the creative voices of women from all walks of life, exploring community, ecology, & feminism. I’ve been a big supporter of theirs for a while now (they are so kind and down to earth!), and it’s always on honor to receive positive feedback from them. You can read all of the fly past issues on their website. I’ve written about creativity a few times on the blog, including tips to nurture your creativity, and ideas to restore your creative spirit. I return to these essays at times when I feel disorganized, unsure, or doubtful. And then I return to the work, even if I feel uninspired, too ‘busy’, or overwhelmed. My work is a practice in creative accountability.
First forget inspiration. Habit is more dependable. Habit will sustain you whether you’re inspired or not. Habit will help you finish and polish your stories. Inspiration won’t. Habit is persistence in practice. —Octavia Butler
Being a clinician is similar to being a creative. Practice and experience allow for potential to unfold. Where persistence gets you through. Where focus begets effortlessness. Where holding back is no longer a habit. Where the connection between all that you love, and a deep desire to give begin to take shape. You simply witness, give thanks, and let it flow.